Today, there is no news. **Warning very rude Limerick**

One night a man drank too much stout.
His cock a hard on would not give out.
It just wouldn't budge, a stiffy's too much
so his missus had to do with being licked out.

There's your dirty limerick, if you don't know, just don't ask and please accept my deepest apologies.

Welcome to the super secret, not going to publish a blog this week, blog.

Aside from a sneaky half on Friday with a good friend, I have not imbibed alcohol since Wednesday the 3rd of October.  I'm not going anywhere near 'Go Sober for October', but in the somehow continuing quest to sample more beer, I've drank a lot in the last few weeks & need a break.

Sunday approaching will see the wagon roll again and will bring some up to date beer recommendations.  Until then let's have a recap of some of the outstanding ales of 2018 so far.  I am pretty much certain you can still find these gems.

January, sick and tired of you hanging on me.  No I'm not because I have my birthday in the first month of the year, didn't sup a lot but made up for that with a few of Torrside's big strength monsters range so I present....
Torrside's Monsters Double Spartacus. A heavy weight 13.60% by alcohol volume and described as an 'Imperial DIPA?' Is that a double double? Plenty of hops, plenty of bang for your buck and I reckon still available in Beermoth, drink it before the flavour fades.

February made me shiver. To counter that all that shivering might I advise going to Bargain Booze and purchasing a bottle of:
Black Jack's One Eyed Jack Brettanomyces Barrel Aged.  All the tang of a Belgian stout but without the flimsiness. Instead you have a great slightly sour fruity export strength stout.

March, cos we'll go marching on!  Gird your loins for all that marching with a pint of real ale porter:
Beer Nouveau's Peterloo.  Go to their brewery tap at the weekend and there is a good chance you can get a pint of this thoroughly Mancunian porter hand pulled from a wooden cask.

April fools no one. I reckon a trip to The Epicurean on Burton Road West Didsbury would be rewarded with the opportunity to purchase a bottle of:
Cheshire Brewhouse's Conger Tun.  A scotch ale that give subtle hints of pine and some beautiful brown sugar flavours that makes you think of wee heavies from Scotland.

May I bore you talking about beer? Take a trip to Waitrose or order with an online shop:
Saviour's Saison.  A fantastic lemony refreshing beer, great introduction to the style.

June dear!  Can you pass the BBC authorised trousers joke?  The Cooperative will sell you a can of:
Ægir Bryggeri's Littlebro. A snappy little IPA from Norway, that will have you exclaiming 'No Way!'

July?  Oh bugger!  Sorry no crappy pun. Beermoth is still I believe selling bottles of:
Weird Beard's Dirrty Haands. A stronger than usual German style Schwarzbier. Tasty!

August or what?  Bargain Booze might still be able to exchange cash or card payment for:
Cloud Water's DDH IPA Chinook Ekuanot. IPA so full of hoppy goodness I used it as beer cordial.

September! Do you Remember? No I don't, far too much beer.  Consigned to Oblivion:
Atom Beer's Oblivion. A Raspbery Milk Stout?  Mmmm gives a real boozy Neapolitan ice cream flavour.

 **Starts beatboxing**
There'll be no freestyle rap,
I don't do that rhyming crap

I won't throw bars just to vent
from me you'll get no lyrical content.
**Drops mike**